Monday, July 19, 2010

Future Shock

I had the dubious pleasure of undergoing a full DOT physical on Friday, including the ever-popular turn-your-head-and-cough rubber glove treatment.

Hernia Exam. So much fun...

Somewhere between discussing colorblindness levels (I barely squeaked through) and explaining several of my myriad scars (tattoos with better stories) we got on to the topic of the stemming of the oil leak and the fact that the Teleprompter-reader-in-Chief would no doubt take sole credit for plugging the hole...
Whereupon the Doctor launched into a surprising Anti-Urkel tirade.
"That bastard's gonna bankrupt every doctor in the country- Hospital and clinics will become factories staffed by veterinary school drop outs. 90% of existing student loans for Med School attendees will be defaulted since they won't be able to get a job that will enable them to pay the loans off. No sane or intelligent person will even go to medical school, since it will be the equivalent of getting a government job once they graduate..." and on and on...


Gee- Thanks Doc! Wait... Is that a condom on a stick?

As I was leaving he followed up with - "Go do a search on HIPAA and HITECH...
It'll show you what were going to see in the next few years..."

Wow...

After reading through quite a bit of governmental double speak I started to see this tableau:

Day 62 of the New World Health Regime

Obesity Czar to his Minions:
"Ok... Let's do Duval County Florida next...
Give me a list of all the men ages 17 to 35 with a body mass index greater than 25% and the ones 35 and above with a BMI of 27%. Run an exception query to make sure they aren't exempt due to diabetes or something.
Send them an email with a 90 day mandate to get within spec. Notify their employers; let them know that these guys have 90 days to square their asses away or it's off to Club Fed for Nutrition and Fitness re-education."

Seriously-
HIPAA Standards HIT 170.302

(e) Record and chart vital signs.
(1) Vital signs. Enable a user to electronically record, modify, and retrieve a patient’s vital signs including, at a minimum, the height, weight, blood pressure, temperature, and pulse.

(2) Calculate body mass index. Automatically calculate and display body mass index (BMI) based on a patient’s height and weight.
...
(g) Incorporate laboratory test results.

(1) Receive results. Electronically receive clinical laboratory test results in a structured format and display such results in human readable format.

(2) Display codes in readable format. Electronically display in human readable format any clinical laboratory tests that have been received with LOINC® codes.

(3) Display test report information. Electronically display all the information for a test report specified at 42 CFR 493.1291(c)(1) through (7).

(4) Update. Enable a user to electronically update a patient’s record based upon received laboratory test results.
...
(h) Generate patient lists. Enable a user to electronically select, sort, retrieve, and output a list of patients and patients’ clinical information, based on user-defined demographic data, medication list, and specific conditions.
...
(n) Public health surveillance. Electronically record, retrieve, and transmit syndromebased public health surveillance information to public health agencies in accordance with one of the standards specified in §170.205(g).

...And of course, we shall never let a crisis go to waste...
(p) Emergency access. Permit authorized users (who are authorized for emergency situations) to access electronic health information during an emergency.

Is it time to get off the grid yet?

TBG- ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒE

1 comment:

Borepatch said...

Maybe you and I can be in the same re-education camp.

;-)